Why I don't Compete with People

I played quite a few sports in my younger years. Now I know my newer friends are probably reading that first sentence and thinking, “Really? What happened to you?” But I promise, I have the trophies, pictures, and other people who will back me up. I played a lot of sports in my younger years. 

Trust is Essential

While playing sports, I learned a lot of valuable life lessons that are still with me today. For example, American football taught me that trust is a significant factor when working with teams. There are 11 people from each team on the field. The primary job of 10 of these people is to protect the person with the football. And to move the football from one end of the field to the other. 

A person called a quarterback is central to the success of the team. He frequently has to trust others to carry, catch, or defend the football. The teams start out in what is called a huddle. This is essentially a gathering where the quarterback provides instructions for what the team is to do next.

Next, they make a move to what is called the line of scrimmage. This is where the 11 men face off with the 11 men on the other team. After that, someone passes the ball to the quarterback who executes the plan. Typically that means he’s giving the ball to someone else to run or throwing the ball to someone else in attempts to reach the other side of the field. 

The person handling the ball has to trust that the other 10 men on the football field are doing something constructive that will protect the football. For example, some players may be clearing a pathway for the person with the football while others may be creating distractions to divert the other teams attention away from what’s really happening. And with all this action going on, each player must trust that the other will do his job. So football taught me the importance of trust when working in teams.

It Pays to be Patient and Persistent

Baseball taught me the power of practice, persistence, and patience. I only played baseball one year. I wanted to be good at baseball. I really did. I tried hard, I practiced every day -- catching, hitting, throwing. I started off the season as a terrible player. I could catch and I could throw. I simply could not hit the ball.

There was something extremely intimidating about standing in a little box with a stick in my hand waiting for someone standing a few feet away to throw a small hard ball directly at me. But each day I would face my fear. I would stand in that box, hold the stick in my hand, and wait for the ball to come flying towards me. I’d swing and each time I would miss. So I would try it again and miss again. Third times the charm, right? No. I would miss the third time. Three strikes in baseball and you are out.

The people before and after me had no problem launching the ball into outer space. Okay, maybe I am exaggerating a little, but it seemed like everyone could hit the ball except me. With the encouragement of the coach and the rest of the team, each day I would stand in that box, wait for the ball to be hurled towards me, and swing the bat hoping to make a hit.

Now, I can’t say that I became some stellar baseball player, but for that one year that I played baseball we received the first place trophy. I started the year off as a terrible player and ended the year as a bad player (hey that's a notch up from terrible so I'll take it). Towards the end of the season, I finally hit the ball. A few times and not just at practice. LOL. This was a drastic improvement from where I began. So baseball taught me the power of practice, persistence, and patience.

Teamwork Makes the Dream Work

Soccer taught me the true meaning of teamwork. Soccer is an exhausting game where the people with the most endurance are the ones who usually win. In my position I played goalie. Goalie (goalkeeper, goal tender, etc) is the person who defends the goal. You are the gatekeeper of the “end zone.” As a goalkeeper, I was never scored upon and I played soccer for several years. But I think the reason that I was never scored upon has more to do with the fact that the team as a whole did an excellent job of defending our position. 

But the sport that I learned the most from was track. Our coach would always say,

"Don’t worry about the person to your left or the person to your right. Give it your all every time you’re on the track." 

This was interesting. He was actually telling us not to compete against other people, but instead to do our personal best.

Do Your Best and Forget the Rest

If you’ve never been to a track competition let me explain how it works. I ran the 100-yard dash, which means you run as fast as you can for 100 yards and hope that your time is faster than everyone else’s. There are usually many people running in this particular race so it’s split up into what is called heats. For example, if you have 30 people running the 100-yard dash you may have three heats of 10 people (3x10=30). The top 3 times from the first 3 heats will get to run in the final and last race (3x3=9 people) which decides the ultimate winner of the 100 yard dash. 

There is one track meet that I will never forget. We had three heats and then a final round. I was running in heat one in the middle of the pack. There were people to the left of me and people to the right.

Runners to your marks, get set, go. And we took off. For the first 25 yards there was no clear front runner but then all of a sudden I began to pull away from the pack. I looked left and I looked right. I was all alone.

Because I was so far in the lead, I began to slow down a bit. I crossed the finish line in first place and was very satisfied with my performance. I watched the other two heats and eagerly anticipated running in the finals. When they posted the name of the 9 runners who would be competing in the final round, my name was not on the board. 

But wait, I didn’t understand. I won my heat. I beat everyone else in the heat with me. Unfortunately, there were 9 runners in the other heats who had times that were faster than mine.

It was at this moment that I remembered the words of my coach:

“Stop competing against the other runners. Do your personal best every time you hit the track.” 

I did not make the final round because my time was not as good as other runners in the other heats. 

Here are the top 3 reasons I don’t compete with other people. 

1) It Increases Risky Behavior

Unhealthy competition with others increases risky behavior. Don't take my word for it, there’s new research suggesting that co-workers competing against one another increases risk taking behavior. In other words, it increases the possibility that one co-worker may sabotage the work of a fellow employee. The research showed that the risky behavior increased when the individuals were close in age or had similar traits, such as going to the same college or having the same major. 

Have you ever seen unhealthy office behavior due to unnecessary competition?

2) Unhealthy Competition Brings Contempt

The second reason that I don’t compete with other people is that unhealthy competition brings contempt. You begin to focus on other people instead of doing your best. This becomes unhealthy when the competition invokes feelings of anger and hatred towards another person. Instead focus on performing at your best.

Who are you currently mad at because you are engaging in unhealthy competition?

3) You Are Your True Competition

The third reason that I don’t compete against other people is that you are your only competition. Doing your personal best is the ultimate success. This means reframing the definition of success.

Imagine running your first marathon and coming in last place. Just finishing the race is a success.

Focus On What Matters

I refuse to waste valuable time focusing on other people (okay sometimes I can't help, but I am human right?). I vow to try my personal best in life. Had I done that many years ago, perhaps I would have won the 100 yard dash.

Are you competing against others?

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About the Author

I am an advocate for better business environments. In my day job as an auditor, I have helped companies save millions while reducing redundancies. As an author, speaker and trainer, I hope to do my part in improving people, processes and profits.

Disclaimer

All comments are my personal opinion and may not reflect past, current or future employer opinions.

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